


More than a Housewife(Househusband?)

by Skylocked



Series: 00QAD Tumblr drabbles [7]
Category: 00QAD, James Bond (Craig movies), London Spy
Genre: Cats, Danny in booty shorts should be illegal, Domestic Fluff, Fluff, M/M, Pam being Pam, Polyamory, SO MUCH FLUFF, everyone loves danny, housewife danny, how does one poly?, sassy Q is canon, this is Forge's fault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-27
Updated: 2017-04-27
Packaged: 2018-10-24 17:44:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,371
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10746669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Skylocked/pseuds/Skylocked
Summary: Just a normal morning in the 00qad household. Danny cooks while everyone else stares and Pam steals yet another sausage off the table. Yep, just another boring morning in the house of two spies, one highly intelligent quartermaster, and the cute husband of three that keeps their place and their relationship together...





	More than a Housewife(Househusband?)

**Author's Note:**

> This is all a-froger-and-a-pointmant's fault. She came into my inbox and wrote to me:  
> "Housewife Danny"  
> And so 2K words later we have this.  
> Enjoy the domestic 00qad!!  
> \---  
> Also this is only barely edited from the copy-pasted version from the chat where it all happened therefore any and all mistakes are my own. Feel free to point out any typos. Thank u and bless.

It was just another regular morning in the 00qad household. Nothing out of the ordinary really. I mean, housewife Danny making breakfast for his 3 husbands was a normal occurrence…  
Wearing a pair of pink and blue booty shorts from that time he and Q dressed in loose muscle shirts, tiny booty shorts and knee-high socks for an 80's themed party at Danny's job wasn’t all that strange, maybe…

Neither was it strange for the agents or their quartermaster to find the younger man dancing to some happy tune while flipping pancakes and singing to some popular pop song while wiggling his plush butt and shaking his hips to the rhythm. Yeah, just a normal morning. No biggie…

Danny poured some more batter into the pan into a perfect round shape even Alex, their second resident genius and love of numbers would be proud of. And speaking of Alex…

Danny remains glued to his work unaware that the agent has arrived home from his morning run and headed straight to the kitchen upon hearing the happy sounds coming from the room, or that Q, the other resident genius, is already there, standing under the threshold, arms crossed over his chest and an amused expression on his face, his dark hair tousled in all directions from sleep.

James, the oldest (and deadliest) of the four, walks out from the bathroom, clean shaven and freshly washed. He raises a questioning eyebrow at Alex, who just smiles and shrugs and joins Q at the kitchen entrance kissing his fluffy curls in greeting.

James makes his way to three of his partners and drapes himself over them like the giant lazy lion that he his. He rubs his nose against Q's nape earnings a slow and contented hum from the quartermaster. Then his eyes shift to the scene before him, Danny still dancing and cooking while unaware that his three lovers are all watching him with equally fond looks in their eyes.

As if on cue, all three step forward, glance at each other and back and Danny and a playful smirk takes over their faces. They approach Danny slowly, like wild felines getting ready to pounce on their unsuspecting prey. All at once six pairs of arms wrap around Danny enveloping him in the warmest and to be honest, most convoluted octopus hug ever. 

Danny squeals a high pitched protest as the spatula in his hand goes flying off landing on Pampuria, their spoiled little persian princess who had been napping on the counter. The cat hisses and runs away, tail impossibly fluffed up in offense. _How dare they!!_

Turing, Pampuria’s little brother and the more reasonable of the two cats, just looks at them from his place atop the fridge without a care in the world, his gray striped tail swishing back and forth in amusement.

"Good morning sunshine" James all but purrs against Danny's neck.

Q is laughing against him too all the while trying to wriggle free from the hug. As much as he loves cuddle piles, the pancake on the stove is beginning to burn...

"Um... guys? I suggest we release the hostage if we want food instead of charcoal?"

Alex hums in agreement and lets Danny go pecking him on the cheek first.

"I hate it when Q is the voice of reason" The agent says playfully and Q jabs at his ribs.

"Excuse me? I'm always the voice of reason here" Q quips only sounding mildly offended.

Danny gives them all an unimpressed look and goes back to salvaging the cake that is only slightly burnt on one side. Good thing he was already done with the eggs and sausage…

"You guys will be the end of me one day" He scolds sounding less annoyed than what he was originally going for...oh well.

"It's not our fault you enjoy making us suffer?" James offers trying to shoo Pam away from the already served plates of eggs and sausage. The cat swats at him and they both stare intently at each other. James will never understand why the former Spectre cat hates him so much. But the feeling is mutual (sure, Bond, sure) so they're even. How Q can put up with her is beyond James. 

Pampuria finally relents after making sure to give the older of the agents a piece of her mind and making away with a good chunk of delicious sausage, and she bounces off to find something else to terrorize, James thinks to himself as he watches her go.

"Wait...what?" Danny turns to give James an incredulous look of betrayal. "How am I making _you_ suffer!!?"

"Well for starters..." Q interjects amused. A contented Alex hanging off of him. "You were singing and shaking your bum in a very provocative way..and we all have eyes, Danny. _We have eyes._ " He points out as if that explains everything.

"And dicks too" James adds with a smirk "don't forget the dicks"

Alex snorts but nods an affirmative.

"And you're wearing those shorts that should honestly be illegal?" Alex offers. Danny goes red at the nose and ears.

"...you....Well...well maybe you shouldn't have been lurking on me like a bunch of perverts!" Danny squeaks out, face the color of the cute tomatoes embroidered on the apron he is wearing. He folds his arms in front of his chest and pouts and it's the most adorable sight the three other men have seen all morning. Or at least is up there in the top ten...

James makes his way back to Danny and pokes his nose then places a kiss on it for good measure. 

"Well maybe we like what we see a little too much.” he laughs “You shouldn't be so bloody adorable if you don't want the full attention of three hungry... perverts...on you this early in the morning, dear"

"Touche" Both Alex and Q reply in unison.

Danny scrunches his nose in feigned distaste and turns around towards the forgotten pan he had been making pancakes in.

"You people are impossible and I hate you all." He huffs but he is smiling with barely contained mirth. Truth be told, he loves having his three amazing husbands doting on him. Of course that doesn't mean he has to let them know lest their egos get any bigger, heaven knows James's at least doesn't need any more boosting.

Suddenly two muscular arms wrap around him from behind and he doesn't even have to turn to look to know it is James. The agent just can't keep his hands to himself, can he? Danny giggles as James nuzzles his neck pressing small kisses here and there; the gold band adorning his ring finger sparkling with the light from the early morning sun filtering through the window coverings. Danny feels a sudden wave of warmth blossom in his chest. He still can't believe that he is married to this man, or the other two.

He must have done something really good in his past life to deserve the happiness that surrounds him every day since finding love in the three people he shares a home and his life with.  
Danny intertwines his fingers with James's and brings the agent's hand to his lips to kiss the ring. James hums and smiles against the crook of Danny's neck. 

"I love you too" He breathes against the taut expanse of skin between Danny's shoulders and kisses them softly loving the way Danny's body responds to his touches.

"Well someone is getting too touchy-feely over there" Q complains with a huff.

"Jealous much, quartermaster" James turns his head towards Q and winks, the bastard.

"Maybe, so?" Q replies flatly. "We love him too and you're hogging him all to yourself, double-oh seven"

"Just like you hog all the covers at night?" Alex laughs hugging Q tighter to himself and it’s Q’s turn to pout petulantly.

"Besides…” Alex continues after placing a wet and noisy kiss on Q’s cheek. “I'm pretty sure Danny knows we love him even if we're not all over him like James over there. At least yet. Patience Q, remember? James has to go in for debriefing soon anyway. We'll have Danny all to ourselves for the rest of the day.” Alex finishes, a cocky smirk directed at James.

This has James letting go of Danny and gasping in an exasperated manner with his hand over his chest

"You wound me!" He says giving both of them his best impression of a kicked puppy.

"I can't believe" 

Q rolls his eyes at him and Alex snorts

Danny covers his mouth to stifle his laughter.

"You are such a drama queen!" Q offers in the same dramatic manner. James blinks at him twice. 

"Did you just...?" 

Alex lets go of Q holding his stomach with both hands from the sudden burst of laughter that takes over him. 

Danny too bursts out laughing no longer able to contain it. 

"I can't believe you just quoted Megamind at me" James pouts. 

Q starts laughing too and suddenly the whole kitchen is alive with noise dragging Pam out her hiding spot, and Turing down from the fridge, the two cats curious as to what the commotion is all about.  
Pam twitches her tail and flicks her ears in annoyance, Turing rubs his bum against his sister and licks at her face. Pam hates-loves when he does it, it ruins her perfectly brushed pelt even if it does feel heavenly. 

Pam turns her attention back to her humans. They're so weird, why does she even put up with them? 

The smell of the sausages forgotten at the table catches her attention once again... 

Oh that's right, they feed her delicious foods and pamper her like the Queen she is. Pam guesses she can put up with the humans a bit longer after all as she jumps back on the table to steal another sausage, Turing following after her curious. Pam gives the tom a pointed look as if saying: _Well, aren't you gonna partake of this feast?_

Turing rolls on his belly and being too close to the edge of the table he falls off making Pampuria jump in surprise...which ends up with her fluffy butt knocking a glass of milk off the table and all four of her humans turning towards the mess at the same time. 

Danny rushes to the broken glass on the floor and Pam is sure she will get the scolding of a lifetime for this... 

That still doesn't stop her from lapping at the milk that has her paws soaked. Ugh...she hates getting her paws wet... but the milk is good so she will deal. 

James gives her his best disappointed-dad glare while Q picks her and Turing up from the floor. 

"Tsk tsk Pam you know better than to try and steal food from the table, baby" Q doesn't sound mad in the least as he rubs his face against the white fluff of her body. Pam meowls at him in response, a low purr building up in her belly. 

Q sets both cats down by their nests petting and kissing each of them before turning to help clean the mess in the kitchen floor. 

Danny has already picked up all the pieces of the broken glass and is on his knees cleaning the spilled milk with a rag, his shorts running up revealing the perfectly formed muscles of his thighs and ass. 

It doesn't surprise Q in the least to see both Alex and James staring openly. Q sighs. It really isn't fair to both his heart and his libido to have such attractive men in his life. 

The way they’re staring at the younger man stirs something inside Q’s gut and leaning against the counter for support is all he can do to keep his composure. 

"Ok listen, as much as I enjoy seeing you both eye-fuck Danny while he is bent over like that... I really think we should get breakfast over and done with. We all need to eat first before we can move on to.... Other activities..." Q says and licks his lips unconsciously as his eyes run up and down both of the agents’ forms. 

"Um... " Danny gets up from the floor clearly flustered at the implications of Q's words. No matter how long they've been together ( _We've been married for three years now Danny, really?_ ) He will never get used to the feeling of being wanted by the three gorgeous men currently looking at him like he is the most delectable thing in the universe.

Alex, always the voice of reason and logic actually has the decency to look at least a tiny bit embarrassed as he looks away from Danny and starts rearranging the table.

"Q is right" he says and smiles at the comeback he already knows is coming from the Quartermaster.

"Thank you, darling, I'm always right"

He doesn't even have to think about it, the sass just oozes out of him without warning. But they all love him more for it.

Even if they roll their eyes at him as James is currently doing...

"Alright, so...food then fucking?" James adds, the blunt oaf that he is. "Because I mean, I don't know about you but I'm starving" He winks at Q again then innocently bumps against Danny's butt as he helps him bring the plate of pancakes to the table.

"And in more ways than one" He adds with a mischievous grin.

Danny glares at him without any bite and takes vengeance by slapping James's perfectly formed ass with his now recovered spatula.

Q laughs and Alex snorts and James _does not yelp_ , thank you very much.

"Don't slap the pancake batter" Q deadpans and everyone groans as they take their places at the table.

Yeah, Danny loves all his lovers and he wouldn't change a damned thing about their dynamic…

...Or about the outfit he decided to wear when he woke up determined to make his lovers breakfast before any of them could leave the house. Danny smiles to himself at this.

It’s shaping out to be a really good morning in the 00qad household.

-THE END- 

**Author's Note:**

> :')))))))


End file.
